Refined by fire

Life has a funny way of turning out differently than what you originally planned. I feel God saying to me in every aspect of my life "You are not in control." For a control freak this is not an easy lesson to learn and accept. I started planning my life early, and by the age of 5 knew exactly how my life would be. Unfortunately I didn't figure out till recently that life is not about what I want, or the plans that I make. My life exists to serve, bring glory, and know God more. Through a series of hardships God has shown me that He is not my fairy God father, existing only to answer my prayers. He is a big powerful God who deserves my worship and faith even when I don't get what I want, or what I think I need. We are promised that we will struggle: "...In this world you will have trouble...", but somehow I missed that sermon growing up. Trouble has been a battle for me the past two years, and through it came brokeness, and through brokeness came faith and grace. I now understand what it means to have a faith built on rock and not on sand. Faith is truly about believing that God is good when you can't see good things around you, or feel good things inside you. God is good all the time. God was good when I miscarried our first two children, God was good when we lost over 50% of our income and struggled to pay bills, God is good when I deliver baby's whose mothers don't care about them, and God is good when Dave prays with a student who isn't sure they belive in God at all. The fires of life are hot, and they can leave you feeling burned. The beauty is the things that withstand the fire are refined and a little more pure than they were before. The great news is that "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble, BUT take heart! For I have overcome the world." John 16:33