Thankful

It is thanksgiving and I am sitting in my parents beautiful mountain house. I thought I should update our blog since it has been a while. I am very thankful for having the previously mentioned issues of our pre-application resolved and out of the way. I was able to see my doctor in Apex, and she wrote a lovely letter to the adoption agency. A few days later our preliminary application was accepted! YEAH! One step down and many more to go. We are currently working on the formal application. Once that is in we will begin the home study portion of this adventure. We are very thankful to just be moving forward. We are very thankful that God is in control of this situation and we will work as if we are working for the Lord through this whole process.
On another note, we are very thankful for such amazing families and friends. We have such a spirit of love and support surrounding us. We are thankful for the Tigers going to the ACC championship to compete- even though we cannot be there :( We are thankful for having an amazing church. We are thankful for all of the material gifts we have been given. We are thankful for our marriage and the joy and strength that it brings. We are thankful for our cats and the joy they bring.
Most importantly: We are thankful for Jesus and for the fact that He sacrificed himself so that we could have the abundant life. He works through our mess to make it a beautiful masterpiece.
He never gives up on me and never allows my mess to separate me from His love and provision. I hope everyone is having a Happy Thanksgiving!

a lot of emotions

I got news yesterday that I will need to travel to Raleigh to see the doctor who treated me in high school in order for her to complete the paper work that we have been waiting for. It amazes me how people can kick you when you are down. The nurse that called me to let me know said "if you truly cared about the child you want, you wouldn't care that you need to drive here for an appointment." It took more grace than I had not to let this woman know just how much I cared. I was then informed that there were no appointments available at times that I could make them. There was a moment of despair, doubt, and weakness that immediately followed. Talk about hitting a wall of hurt and discouragement. The upside is that I did receive another call later informing me that the doctor would work me in on Nov. 13th, so I have an appointment. The events of this week were leaving me feeling like an emotional mess, and then I received a note on facebook sharing with me a wonderful blog. I read about this woman's journey through infertility, loss, and adoption. I read about what she learned and what God has done in her life and was reminded yet again that I am not alone. Waiting is part of God's plan- saying this to myself over and over- waiting is a part of God's plan! What stuck out to me the most is how she clung to scripture. She wrote them down, dwelled on them, memorized them, repeated them, and knit them into her heart to speak truth to her at times like this. I want a fire and need for God's word like this woman. I want to wrap my heart in it and let it sink in to the depths of my soul. I need it. I need to invest more effort into knowing God's active voice so that when my doubts speak loudly I can tune them out. Thank God for putting His words on paper and allowing us to have access to them.